Ridin' broncs, the trade I've plied,
Has left me disappointed.
It's not only my broken pride:
My elbows are disjointed.
My legs are at an angle
'Cause my knees are outta whack.
My arms just kinda dangle
And my back... oh God, my back.
I can get through most the days
By takin' pills and tonics.
You should see all my x-rays:
They're full of neat bionics.
Seems some days it's really hard
To keep myself together;
My joints have been so often jarred
That they predict the weather.
'Scuse me while I check my wrists
And try to get 'em movin'.
Look, the left one actually twists:
It might just be improvin'!
My memory isn't very good:
My thoughts just kinda stray.
I'd tell ya more, if I could...
Forgot what I was gonna say.
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